Through Eyes that Have Cried

                                                                                                                                                                  

“There are many things that can only be seen through eyes that have cried.”

Saint Oscar Romero

                                                                                                                                                                 

“I guess we are taking turns having mental breakdowns,” she said with a light-hearted laugh that made my blood run cold. I held my breath until, at last, the conversation shifted.

Mental breakdown.

There are many ways to use these two words. But in the summer of 2023, I found myself using them to explain my month-long absence from the lives of my closest friends.

I’ve known for a long time that many, many people are suffering from mental illness. Over the years, I’ve walked with others who have dealt with anxiety and depression. I’ve personally dealt with brief periods of severe anxiety.

But mental illness took on a whole new meaning the day that I completely lost touch with reality. And during my hospitalization, I met dozens of other people suffering under the enormity of its weight. This reality is something I will never be able to unsee.

In the darkness and uncertainty that comes in the wake of a mental breakdown, I’m hanging on to the hope that God promises to those who walk with Him. And I’ve decided to share because I would venture to guess there is another person out there who needs the encouragement I so badly needed a few years ago.

I pray that my reflections will remind you that you are loved. That you are precious in His eyes. And most of all, I hope my stories remind you that God not only sees you, but that He is also working out a plan to bring you into a place of refreshment and light.